guess who's back?

Since I've been home I start to get little mini anxiety attacks. But then something always comes just in time to give me a wake up call. The past couple of days I was feeling stressed. All of the classes that I need are full, living situation in Provo isn't going to be what I had planned a few months ago, need to find a job, need to do meaningful things with my time... etc.

I was reading one of my old journals from April of 2009. It says: "...i feel like i am really learning a lot about life these days. do you ever just get the strong sense that you are being prepared for something great?" Mind you, this was about three months before I decided to make a life changing decision and serve a mission for a year and a half. How neat that my subconscious sensed that there was something more in store for me in the near future.

So.. today. I read that. I felt that little tingle that everything is going to be okay. I thought about this talk that I had read called, "I will prepare the way before you." ... you can read it here! It's all about how different things prepare us in our lives. Whether they be obstacles, people, diversions, or pains. Each little detail in our life can make for something huge. And I realized that it's going to all be okay. Maybe all of my art classes are full and I'm going to have to start a Spanish minor to have a full load of classes this semester. It could make me stay in school a little longer, but I could also find new hobbies and interests from things I would have otherwise never looked into. Maybe BFF is moving somewhere indefinitely and I have to live with new people, but maybe I'll make friends I wouldn't have otherwise made or looked for. Maybe I don't have a job and it stinks feeling like a lowlife sucking money from mom and dad, but maybe I could enjoy the little break and try to learn as much as i can about balancing my life and relationships. Just like in April of 2009, I think I am realizing again that maybe there is something bigger in store. And that I don't have to fear change or obstacles. I can embrace them and let the good come from them.

A person i really look up told me before I left my mission, "don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened."

here's to change, and to the rebirth of my blog.

missed y'all, cyber peeps.
xoxo
brittany

please watch my favorite part of benjamin button that also has to do with choices and obstacles: